Tuesday, May 30, 2006

If I could get a dime

If I could get a dime for every girl I have ever liked. I know... it seems that I am simply obsessed with girls, and in a way I am sure you could definitely build the case that I have issues, and I would probably argue for you instead of defending myself.
Truth is, I do like girls a lot and I find most of them fascinating. A creation of complex thoughts and simple pleasures, mysterious motivations and beautiful hopes.
Right now there's this girl I like. I actually asked her out last weekend. We're supposed to go out this next weekend. She's a mystery to me. I like many things of her. I like it that she finds pleasure in the simple things and details of life. I love it that she is easy to talk to and always willing to make the moment better.
I am fascinated by her. I like her shape and her hair. The way she smiles and her radiant blue eyes. She's all outdoors and adventurous, tanning lotion and snorkeling... whereas I am... not.
I wish it was that simple for me. As my fans you probably know how... picky, to say the least, I can be when it comes to women. I've said how much I like them and how I like many at the same time, but really for me to hold any kind of interest in one it's quite difficult actually.
Which is why I tend to make it difficult for me to let go sometimes.
Right now I don't know what to think of of what will happen. I know I will know more after our first date. I just, again, wished it was simpler. I am looking for a potential 'all-purpose-best friend'... I've explained this concept in the book, or whatever I'm writing. It makes this thing difficult because not only I am looking for someone to laugh with and someone with whom imagining a family looks not only plausible but mostly exciting. I am looking for someone who can challenge me in the things that matter.
I am looking for that woman who will shake my very notions and make me see a new reality because she, on her own, has experienced those new notions. I am talking about no other than God.
I care mostly about the possibility that she can turn my world upside down and make me wish I was a better man.
And so, right now, as I write this and think about how this girl could or could not be the one I am looking for, a quiet, not so obvious character shows up in my world. A gentle, small but almost embarassing...'thing' that I am willing to see how it evolves on its own. At least that's how they say it happens right? It happens to you, you don't make it happen.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

i feel the same on a lot of issues... but im still in the teenager world i dont have as many heavy thoughts on my mind. Im sure we experience similar things as all guys too... women are definitely interesting though

10:19 PM  

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